The reality of letting go...

Its been about week and a half since we dropped off Christian at LAX.  I don't know how, but we found the strength to see him off, to physically let him go, and not actually lose it.  It was hard and there were tears but they were full of pride and so much love. It is his turn to start his life's journey at school and in this case in Spain, and we can't hold him back. We definitely forfeited the privilege of traveling with him and going through the craziness of shopping to get him settled into a dorm at FSU this time around. But instead we made the choice to help pack him up into 2 bags to go experience college in an extraordinary manner in the hopes that the fruits of our labor will be in this adventure to celebrate and enjoy along with him.

I was sweetly texted and messaged by friends and family throughout the day letting us know that they were with us in spirit knowing how hard it would be let Chris go, and we so appreciated feeling supported by all the good vibes and blessings being sent Chris's way. They all let us know it was going to be ok. And it was.

I have to say that I was surprised that as hard as it was at the airport, Jerry and I came home and talked about how much peace we felt and how happy we actually were about it all. Like in the company of all other parents and friends dropping off their kids this year, we felt like we did our job. For the last 18 years, this is what we have worked for, right? We did it! We have been getting ready for this day through every possible experience in life and in school that we could have given him. All of that to prepare him for this day. To prepare US for this day.



So as we reflected, it was kind of hard to be sad about it really. If anything, all we could truly feel is extremely grateful that we were able to give him this opportunity somehow. But how to stop from missing him was now the question.  I was holding up pretty well until the dust settled over the last weekend and the tears showed up as the novelty of "we sent our kid off to college, hooray!" became "Holy Crap! We sent our kid off to college!!!...in Spain!"

What the HECK did we do??!!

I'm getting pretty good at asking and answering my own life questions lately I think. Its helpful when I have to take a step back from panic to talk myself out of it with some common sense reality and logic. Its works most of the time, but if not then Jerry's there to help me through it.
So to answer that lovely question? For one, we did what we would have wanted to do back in our own college days but never got the chance to do. Second, we knew that given all the options this was the best fit for Christian and what he wanted for his future...so we took this opportunity, and now he'll be living it, and we're nothing but excited for him!

As a family, the reality of letting go has been as normal as could be expected I'm sure...

We all miss him! How can we not? Again, we are handling it as well as possible, but seeing the love his younger brothers have for Chris expressed through their heartfelt prayers to keep him safe, and sleeping in his bed to feel close to him can make some days harder than others :') 

Every conversation, skype session and text is cherished and looked forward to. However, although the technology is there to keep us connected, we're finding it necessary to hold back (at least a little) to find a way to give him his space and help relieve him of feeling homesick as much as possible. 

We are celebrating every discovery and experience with him. His stories, his pictures and blog posts produce some of our biggest smiles and happy hearts.    
 
As a mom, I'm find myself worried about something new every other day. Is he sleeping ok or enough? Does he need anything? Is he eating ok, enough or at all? He says he is, but is he really?? Is he just saying that or is he going without something he could have here at home? Ugghh...all the things that can kill a mom's spirit in 2 seconds flat, but I guess all other "top ramen/mac-n-cheese" eating kids have made it through college ok. So yes mom, Its part of the process. He will figure this out too.

At home, we are also figuring out our new normal. Like sleeping with our cell phones nearby, converting time to Spain time every time we look at the clock. To remembering that I am making one less lunch, not necessarily needing to go in his room for laundry, or even remembering to ask for a table for 4 instead of 5 when we go out! Its habit what can I say...we'll always be 5 right? ;)

As parents its 1 down and 2 to go. Danny and Mikey are growing up too. They're needing their own guidance and encouragement to grow and gain their own sense of individuality during this time apart. Chris's going away for college will be a great inspiration to them, but they will find what works best for them when the time comes. For now it will be about continuing to cherish them, who they are and our time with them as life continues to fly by.

Ultimately, this will always be Christian's home, our boys' home, but we've been told by many parents before us that they will become 'visitors' in our home. Kind of sad? Yes! But isn't it a problem we want to have? Its what we want for your kids right? For them to become independent and self sufficient and yet still be there for them to give them a reason to want to come home and visit.

The reality of letting go?...It is what it is for now and will be what it will be in the future. We have officially sent our first born off to school..Hooray! With God's help, Chris will be back in December for the holidays and then leave again, come home in the summer and leave again. Also part of our new normal for the next 4 years to come. It doesn't mean we're supposed to like it or get used to it but its what's supposed to happen. The truth is, we are embracing this reality with every inch of our heart and soul with joy, love and lots of faith.

From my little corner to yours...have a blessed week.

My head space…where its at and where its not

I haven’t really said all that much in the last few months, I know. But honestly, it’s been ok. I feel like I needed a break. I was feeling rushed, pressured (by my own doing) to get stuff written and posted just because, and I never do my best work that way.  Handling both blogs (English and Spanish) was also taking a small toll on me and I hate not giving my all to either one. I love writing… in both languages, but I feel like it needs to be organic and it needs to come to me when I’m ready.  Not to say that some of my best writing hasn’t come from impromptu moments, but my head hasn’t been there lately for anything to come naturally or prompted for that matter.   

So instead of getting myself down with what I’ve been calling “creative guilt” (that guilt of wanting to be a perfectionist, guilt that comes from feeling like I can’t keep up) I began to relax and embrace the fact that I am just in a different head space right now, a different place in my life right now altogether...and that’s ok. It’s more than ok.

I keep mentioning that there’s a lot happening this year and there are things that have needed much more of my attention lately. We’ve successfully ventured through some new experiences. It’s been stressful in so many ways but its turning into one of the most exciting years for all of us in one way or another.  This year is going to be the one that takes each one of us places we’ve never been, outside of the box- literally, physically and emotionally. It’s been especially rewarding and I’m looking forward to much more. 

So I am taking this time to just be me right now.  To be Sandy- the mom, the wife, the daughter, the friend and whatever that may mean for me and my loved ones in the moment.  I’m enjoying being in the present and not necessarily worrying about documenting or having to share every single moment.  It’s not that I don’t want or that I’m not going to but I’m realizing that not every story may necessarily be my story to tell either.  I’m learning to respect those boundaries outside of my own perspectives. I feel like I’m learning so much about myself period. What’s working and what’s not…more or less? That maybe it’s ok to be a little bit more reserved with what memories I want to keep for myself. And that maybe I’m still sharing but just doing it differently, more privately rather than publicly. And that’s ok too.

And as much as I’d like to keep up creatively, again, I’m being as creative as I can be- in my own way, in different ways, and I’m totally enjoying those moments when I feel I’ve discovered some new way to express myself. I’m glad to say that I am successfully working on catching up on my Project Life for 2014/2015, I’m taking lots of pictures (maybe even improving), I'm creating, I'm crafting, I’m baking, I’m cooking (a lot), and hopefully soon, I will be writing more too.  And when I do, as long as I know that it’s coming from a sincere and honest place (like right now), it will all be good. No pressure. It will just be me sharing my life with you.

I hope you'll continue to join me and Thanks for stopping by.

Weight Watcher Wednesday...Lifetime baby!!!

Its time for another Weight Watcher Wednesday update from me and its been a long time since the last one. I had promised myself the next update would be a good one and it is. Its been 3+ years in the making and the time has come...

I finally made it to Lifetime!!

Well first off let me explain that this happened about 2 weeks ago, but with Danny and Mikey culminations being our priority I hadn't had a chance to say anything really until now.

So what does making it to Lifetime mean exactly?

Well in Weight Watcher terms this means that I finally got down to my goal weight and once I did that I went through an additional 6 weeks of maintaining that goal weight at no more than +/- 2lbs during that time frame. Once I successfully did that then you make it to what WW considers to be Lifetime Member Status- a permanent member of the WW family!

So I completed all of this 2 weeks ago and my leader Char made a very sweet presentation and gave me the honors in front of my meeting group. I didn't really expect to get emotional about it, but I did. This was a HUGE moment for me! Something I have been working as most of you know for a very long time...A 'lifetime' as a matter of fact! (lol, I won't apologize for the pun there because it actually fits the description pretty well in my case.)

Having a great leader like Char has been key for me as well. She has been a wonderful support. This isn't the first time she's been my leader, but I found her again  at the Encino office when I needed someone the most. She was the one who most helped me to get through this last leg of this goal. She kept me accountable and honest all the time. She has helped keep me motivated when I was most discouraged and she gave me new things to try along the way. 

 THANK YOU CHAR!!

I have also yet to miss a weekly weigh in in the 3+ years since I joined and I have to say that has been the absolute thing that I am the proudest of and its been the cornerstone of my success. This little lady, Margie, is the one who weighs me in most of the time, and I wanted to thank her as well for making me laugh, for celebrating my good weeks and for commiserating with me those weeks when I needed to vent. Thank you Margie!

One exciting advantage to this special recognition is also a continued incentive for me.  Being a lifetime member now also means that as long as I stay at my goal weight (+/- 2lbs) I get free membership to their online tools and unlimited unpaid meetings. Yes! Soo now I can weigh in for FREEEEEE!!!! Wooohooo!!!

Like I mentioned I have been a paid member for 3+ years now, paying a fee month after month, and I don't even dare calculate the numbers to know what my total investment in myself has been. (investment being the operative word) It just doesn't matter really. It has been been worth every total penny!!!


So in no way does this mean that I have that my weight journey is over...Absolutely not! If anything the work continues now more than ever because this is when most Weight Watchers tend let it go and tend to gain their weight back. I just can't let that happen. The fact that it took this long to get here makes me appreciate my accomplishment that much more. I've worked to hard to let go of this now so I need to work harder now more than ever because I just can't go back! I just can't!

One thing I hope to transmit through my story for those of you who have been following my journey and those of you who are on your own journey at the moment is that you see that its really has taken me over 3 years to get here. I hope you keep that in mind for your own journeys. Weight loss is not an overnight thing! Its not necessarily a 3 year process...it truly is a lifetime process. It may be different for everyone and amongst every struggle you may come across its about keeping the big picture and your ultimate goal in the forefront of your mind. It can happen and it will but it does take some time and work- there is now way around it. But just remember...You are worth it!

So this also will now lead me to my next goal which is to become a Weight Watcher Leader, and I'm working on that as we speak. I would love to be able to help others achieve their goal like my leaders did for me. My next update will hopefully be about that happening sometime soon. 

From my corner to yours...Thank you for stopping by!

Mr. Peabody and Sherman...a movie review

A few weeks ago, I was offered tickets by Allied Hispanic to take the kids to a screening of Mr. Peabody and Sherman in return for a review on my blog, so in the spirit of saying 'Yes' to this... new and unknown opportunities, of course I accepted and here I am with a friendly but honest review to share with you.

The screening was held this past (very rainy) Saturday morning at the Regal Theatre at the Nokia Center in downtown LA.  The boys enjoyed the screening experience in itself, as we got there a little early to take part in some of the pre-screening activities which included balloon making, face painting and each of the boys got their own set of Peabody glasses, a red bow-tie and a movie poster.  Awesome little extra treats!

As an added bonus, especially since we don't usually get to splurge on these, we were pleasantly surprised to find out that we would be watching the movie in 3D! Woo-hoo!


                                                                            Some history first:
The movie is based on the 1950's cartoon Mr. Peabody and Sherman from the Rocky and His Friends animated series. Do you  remember watching re-runs of these cartoons on Saturday mornings?- I do!! Anyway, like most classics nowadays, they've brought a modern version of the cartoon to the big screen for the new generation of kids today.



About the movie-
The movie carries quite of few well known actors  including Modern Family stars Ariel Winter and Ty Burrell as the voice of Mr. Peabody, the most intellectually accomplished dog in the world who adopts and is raising a human boy, Sherman (Max Charles), as his own son. Together they have traveled through time in Peabody's own version of a time machine called the WABAC ("way-back") which has taken them on some of the most incredible historical adventures possible. Sherman has been given a first hand look at history like no other child his age so he unintentionally one ups, Penny (Ariel Winter), another know-it-all classmate during a history lesson. This provokes Penny to become  Sherman's temporary nemesis and the chaos that follows could possibly change his life.

In hindsight the plot of the movie is multilevel and maybe even a bit complex. The story continues as it builds around a variety of today's socially relevant topics  such as- what truly makes up a family unit vs the threat of what is viewed as socially and even legally acceptable, some bullying and even peer pressure. This is what ultimately gets Sherman into some trouble as he tries to impress Penny by taking the WABAC on a joyride, ripping a whole in the universe and possibly changing the course of history. Mr. Peabody is then forced to go out and rescue them and finds himself not only doing that, but figuring out what it means to truly be a parent.

Our review-
My boys loved this movie! Once the movie hits outer space the fun begins. The animation was fantastic and stimulating, and watching it in 3-D really made a difference for me. It was very funny, and full of clever puns that parents could connect with, and according to my oldest son in the 11th grade, he was very impressed with how historically accurate it was, albeit delivered in the most comedic of ways! As an older viewer he said he appreciated the fact that he and the boys were able to relate to the history, and all the scientific references made since they are subjects that they've covered at school. As a parent, I couldn't be happier to hear that and know they were watching a movie that not only entertained them but educated them as well.

One of the things I personally took away from it was the underlying story between a parent and a child, finding out what it means to believe in yourself, and to know that at the end of the day, your parents believe in you too. Or as they boys put it- "they knew they had each other's back, Mom." Exactly boys and don't you forget it!

We hope you'll enjoy it as well, and I'd love to hear what you think of it too.

Mr. Peabody and Sherman premiers this Friday, March 7th at a theater near you! 

From my little corner to yours...Thanks for stopping by!

Note: Thank you to Claudia Sandoval and Alliedim.com for the screening tickets and the opportunity to give a review 
based on my honest opinion and that of my boys.

Its back...Won't you join me??

I know...Its Saturday, but I had to get let you know about this now so you could think about it over the weekend.

So, I've mentioned before that one of my favorite bloggers is Liz Lamoreux. She just has a very special insight into personal reflection yet at the same time can inspire the best in you. I don't know what it is, but I really appreciate her writing, and she's drawn me in ever since.

So as you may have read, back in October I took part in one of Liz's (free) online adventures called
10 days of saying YES to this Moment.  It was a great experience for me and I took you through a peak of what was a very personal journey for me.  In that post I was hoping to share some of the practices I learned with you so that maybe you'd be inspired to try some of them in your life.

But its back!!
Liz is bringing Yes, this 10-day adventure back! 
And I'm in for another round.
 
 
 
Won't you join me this time??

Don't just take a peak! Come and experience this wonderful 10-day adventure for yourself,
but not by yourself.  Let me know and we'll all go on this journey together.

So that's it! Again, think about it! It starts this Tuesday, February 4th, and you still have time to sign up!

For more information and to register head over to Liz Lamoreux's link here. 
Remember, its FREE!!

Have a great weekend!

From my corner to yours...lets say "YES" to this moment together.

Wrapping up 2013...

This year is over tonight and what can I say other than that it feels like it literally flew by. Don't you think so?
I also feel like the holidays crept up on me and many things went on a stand still including this blog, and my first Project Life album (although, do not fret- it will be finished and posted). But as of today, there are stories that will be left untold because there is just NO more time to do so.  The last few weeks have been a bit unexpected, stressful and busy to say the least, but we hope to be ending this year on a good note nonetheless.

I usually give a summary of my year because up until this year, my posts were few and far between so I had to fill in the year for you at the end. But the one thing I think I really accomplished this year was writing and posting the most I ever have in 4+ years. Not only did I write the most this year, but I also accomplished bringing to life and maintaining my spanish blog concurrently...not bad, right?
So I can happily say I've worked really hard this year to post my personal and family life's adventures and events more often than not. I still have a lot of consistency to work on, and will continue to try to improve my blogs, but I can't complain for now.

I was going to summarize my year in pictures, but quickly realized that there were just way toooo many to pick from and the truth is my blog posts have been far from lacking of pictures so I'll spare you guys anymore of that for now.

So in summary- 2013 was a year:

• when new members joined the family and others disconnected
• for the joys of a having a new baby in the house again to be felt
• for our families and friendships near and far continued to be nourished 
• For our boys to grow by leaps and bounds into wonderful young men
• for accomplishments, some disappointment and lessons learned
• for personal and physical strength and growth 
• for skills to be found and put to use
• for learning to teach, trust and let go
• for opportunities to be explored and taken
• for colleges and futures to be discussed and looked at
• for smaller but meaningful trips to be taken 
• that some sports were ended and some new ones tried
• for performances and family talents to be displayed 
• when sad and random acts of unkindness and death happened around us
• where God was truly and always present in our lives
• where we kept realizing just how lucky we really are
• that MANY, many wonderful memories were made despite of it all!!

And I am truly looking for many more to be made in 2014 :)

 
I'll be honest, the new year will prove to start off with some challenges for our family to face already, BUT on the positive side- we fully trust that God will continue to be with us through it all and will help us find hope, happiness and peace to make it a year to remember and celebrate!!

I'll take this time to finish off with a heartfelt THANK YOU to all of you new and old who continue to support this little blog of mine by reading and thoughtfully commenting, and I hope to see you around again for another year's worth of adventures.

May 2014 be the year you want and need it to be!!

From my little corner to yours...

HAPPY NEW YEAR!!!

XOXO

Yes to this Moment - My 10 day journey...

Hello there my friends! Its been a long time, but its just seems like the days are speeding by as quickly as they come as this year starts to come to a close. I have lots to catch you up on, but I first wanted to share with you an adventure I took with Liz.

Liz Lamoreux is one of my new favorite bloggers.  I started following her this year, and I've put her at the top of my list of bloggers I try to read on a daily/weekly basis. As a matter of fact I found her one day as I read her guest post on the Ali Edwards blog  that I am a big fan of.  There was just something about her post that I found was intelligent, comforting and even soothing, and I found myself trailing her back to her own website. I ended up reading some of her past posts, and after reading a little bit about her story I just felt like I connected with her and spirit somehow.

So a few weeks ago she offered a free online course that she described as an invitation to "open yourself up to the beauty and the realness and the joy that surround you each day"... "even in the midst of the messy reality of the everyday." She wanted to share some of her practices via a 10 day personal journey on how to find "that space to take a deep breath and see the beauty" of each moment.  So I decided to join her on this trip, and I'm so glad I did.

Because a journey like this can be such a personal thing I won't be able to recreate my experience 100% for you, but I wanted to at least share with you a summary of the daily prompts she gave all those who joined heron this trip so as to possibly inspire you to take your own journey to say Yes To This Moment.

Liz also encouraged her readers to participate in a big way by sharing our daily experiences through pictures and images on Instagram and Pinterest and forming a community of those saying 'Yes, This' with a hashtag of #yestothismoment. So those of you who follow me on Instagram got to see my daily shots but now you'll understand what they really meant to me in this process.

 Day 1- Finding Silence
The first day of this journey was all about breathing and silence...taking the time to take 5 deep breathes, truly feeling each breath, relaxing  and finding where you stand within that silence. A powerful practice I am now implementing daily.

Day 2- Finding beauty amongst the chaos.
This day Liz reminded us that although our lives are crazy, that living in the moment is a necessity, and in doing that we could find beauty. Tapping into your gratitude goes side by side with this practice as well.

Day 3- Finding my Center
So day 3 was about combining the breathing of day 1 and learning how to use those 5 breathes to really pay attention to how and where my breathing comes from. Coincidentally I was wearing this shirt and I found my center to be where the heart was on my shirt...I liked that.
Once I found my center, I can now use that knowledge to help me go back there especially in those moments when I feel like life is overwhelming me. I found this to be so powerful and I've been using it daily even just to start my day off.

Day 4- Finding my senses
This day was about taking the time to really pay attention to what each of my senses was telling me. What I touched, what I saw, felt, tasted, smelled...hence it worked out perfectly that I was making banana bread which helped me experience each of those senses deliciously!

Day 5- Getting out there and experiencing what I know.
This day landed on a busy Saturday for me, but I found a half hour to get out there and take a walk with my doggie looking for that perfect moment in nature. However, I couldn't really find it until it hit me that I had actually experienced it already, and its what I already knew...the true companionship of my doggie on my walks.  My Lulu is  actually great to walk with, I know I can count on her to keep me safe, and I know that she loves me for taking her for walks.

Day 6- Enjoying a day of Rest
Sundays are a sabbath day for many and so in that spirit...I truly enjoyed this prompt. It just happened to be one of those lazy Sundays where nothing was planned and I had a house full of boys that were busy playing,  so the morning was all mine to enjoy.  I did so by enjoying a meaningful cup of coffee and catching up on the shows I had taped from the week before...Perfect!

Day 7- Seek out Joy
This day Liz challenged us to find what give us joy. Both those tangible and intangible joys. She had us write a list of those things to remind us as well. I chose to post a picture of two of my tangible joys...my beautiful nieces! I am surrounded by boys at home that bring me unconditional joy, but when I am around these two little girls it is a joy like no other. It was a perfect day for it too as it was coincidentally Sofia's 8th birthday.

Day 8- Being open to connections
This day Liz challenged us to see just how open we were to connecting with others. I'd like to think that I am someone who is always open to connecting with others including those from my past.  But as a mom I wanted to concentrate on my connection with my boys that day. I LOVE them and will always be willing to maintain that connection with them. And with a sweet face like Mikey's how can I resist. ;)

Day 9- My Yes List
Today was all about going back through the last 8 days to see what I had been finding in my moments of silence and awareness. What had I been saying 'Yes' to recently. We were to then write a list of what we wanted to say Yes to that particular day and these were 2 of them off my list...'Yes', to the much needed rain we got that beautiful day and 'Yes' to finally getting a chance to wear that super cozy sweatshirt again!

It truly is the simple things isn't it!

Day 10- Yes, Here
The final day of this personal journey was here, and Liz had a beautiful way to end it by challenging us to find 10-15 minutes of quiet time just for ourselves, and I took time in making sure it was as perfect a setting for me as possible. She challenged us to meditate (which I've never really done before) with a candle in front of us to concentrate on. She had us put our hands to our hearts and find all the possibilities of  what our hearts could hold - 'Yes, here' in my heart. What a powerful 15 minutes this was for me. I was able to do my breathing and quietly reflect on the past 10 days and see what a gift each of those practices were for me and point out those possibilities to practice from now on.

The 10 days were over and I was sad to see it come to an end, but at the same time I was so happy to have followed through with and completed this journey to the best of my ability. This was something that I had never tried before or that I honestly had never been open on doing for myself.  I am so glad I did and I will so do it again.  Liz was such an inspiration through this all for me, and I found it easy to trust her direction and knowledge in this area.

Again, just know that there was definitely much more to this journey than I can share in one post (for many reasons), but I just hope that I have inspired you to take your own journey of saying 'Yes to this moment' or to find a personal journey of your own that you'd like to explore for yourself.  At the very least I highly recommend you check out lizlamoreux.com in the hopes you can find something there you can also connect to.

Thank you Liz Lamoreux for sharing yourself with me and for allowing me to take this journey with you. I hope to do it again soon.

And from my little corner to yours...Hope you all have an amazing week!

XO